The Real Story
by Babiebyrd03
Summary: What would happen if Angel was in Sunnydale before Buffy? What if the story about how Angel got his soul was wrong? Read and find out! Rated M for future chapters. MM AngelXander
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Buffy the Vampire slayer or its characters!

Thoughts 

"speaking"

Xander's eyes went wide as Buffy introduced her boyfriend to them. He couldn't believe it, it was Angel, his ex-boyfriend. Xander watched a smiling Willow give him a hug welcoming him into the group. Before he could stop them, tears gathered in his eyes. He looked back at Angel who was watching him, his expression cold and unreadable. "Xander, are you ok?" A worried Willow asked as she spotted the tears in her best friends eyes. Xander shook his head as he took off at a dead run out of the library nearly running over Giles as he entered. "What's wrong with Xander, he was unusable upset." Giles observed. Buffy flipped her blond hair out of her eyes, "He's probably mad that I have a boyfriend and it's not him."

Angel knew that if his heart could beat it would have stopped when he entered the library. Sanding there was the one person he had believed he would never see again. The one he left, the one he was trying to protect by leaving, they one he thought about everyday. Xander. He watched the emotions fly over Xander's face, shock, joy, confusion, hurt, and pain. Angel briefly wondered about the lack of anger but figured that it would come later. He barely reacted to the redhead's hug; he was to busy watching Xander waiting for the outburst. When the tears started Angel wished he could stake himself. It took all of his will power not to run after him. Buffy's statement brought him out of his thoughts, "He's probably mad that I have a boyfriend and it isn't him." Did she really think that she was God's gift to the male gender? Willow shook her head, "I don't think so Buffy, Xander's been turned down before and he's never this upset. In fact the last time he was this upset was about, oh, two years ago. Before you arrived her Buffy." Angel inwardly flinched he had never wanted to hurt Xander only protect him. "Perhaps it is because I'm a vampire," Buffy glared at him, he knew she didn't want the others knowing yet, but he just had to know. Willow, on the other hand, didn't blink and eye, "No, that wouldn't be it, his last boyfriend was a vampire." So she did know. "Xander's gay?" Buffy screeched. "Bi actually," Willow wasn't even paying attention, "I should go find him, make sure he's alright." Willow left quickly.

Xander didn't stop running until he couldn't breath anymore. **Two years, two years**, the thought kept running through his mind, and the tears kept coming. It still felt like yesterday.

**Flash Back**

Xander was in the shower and Angel was still in bed listening to his lover getting ready for school. Angel groaned and throw his arm over his eyes, "If you want to get to school on time you need to start coming out of the bathroom dressed!" Xander laughed as he adjusted the towel around his hips and crawled up the bed to kiss Angel, "Why, I love watching you squirm." Angel rolled them over so he was on top of him, pinning him to the mattress, "Because if you're late again you are going to get detention, again." Angel kissed him hard stopping only to let the other breath. "Yeah, I guess you're right, you're so not worth a detention." Angel laughed as he kissed Xander again, "Get dressed baby, or you're going to need another shower." Xander laughed and pushed his hips against Angel's, "I would Gel," he whispered with another thrust of his hip, "but you're on top of me." Angel growled and kissed him again then quickly rolled off of him. "We'll finish this later," Angel whispered in Xander's ear as he got up and went to get a shower.

(Skip to end of the school day)

"Gel, I'm home!" Xander said as he entered the apartment, but there was no reply. "Angel, where are you?" Xander checked the kitchen, living room, bathroom, and finally the bedroom. As Xander entered the bedroom he stopped dead. Clothes were everywhere but as far as he could tell they were all his. Quickly moving he checked the whole apartment again and found that all of Angel's stuff was gone, well not all Xander found an almost empty bottle of Angel's cologne, a black t-shirt, and a photo of them together; Angel was hugging Xander from behind, Angel resting his chin on Xander's shoulder they were both smiling. By this time Xander was in tears. He made his way back to the bedroom and sat on the bed. There he found, laying on his pillow, an envelope with his name on it in Angel's handwriting:

_Xander,_

_ I am truly sorry I had to leave without even a good-bye, but you got to roll with what you got, right? You're welcome to continue to stay here in the apartment; it's been paid off for another five years. By that time you should have a job and be able to pay the rent by yourself. I don't know if I'll ever be back, but our time together was amazing and I wouldn't change it for anything. I hope you find someone new soon._

_Angel _

End of Flash Back 

Xander woke up to the sound of a branch snapping. He quickly checked his watch it read 12:15 am. **Good Lord, I fell asleep!** "You really should not sleep outside after during the night, you know better then that." Xander's spine stiffened at the sound of that voice, the voice he would know anywhere, the voice he hears in hi dream. Angel.

Angel watched the boy, HISboy, sleeping. He looked so peaceful and beautiful; all Angel wanted to do was curl up with him and stay there forever. That's when Angel noticed the tears start to spill from behind the closed eyelids. **What could he be dreaming about that makes him cry?** Angel didn't even have to finish his thought to know his answer; the day he left. Angel snapped a branch, knowing that it would wake him up he'd always been a light sleeper. He knew that if he didn't want to think about that day he was willing to bet his un-life that neither did Xander. "You really should not sleep out side during the night, you know better then that." He watched Xander's spine stiffen almost painfully straight. "What do you want?" Xander spat the question. Angel sighed he knew he shouldn't expect anything less then hate from him. "When you ran out of the library, Willow went after you but she couldn't find you. You didn't go home or to your "thinking place" as she put it, and asked Buffy and me to help look for you. She was afraid that you had gotten into trouble or had gotten yourself hurt. I remembered that when you were angry or scared you would come up here. So I came up here to find you and make sure you get home safely."

Xander snorted, "Like you care, I bet if Willow hadn't asked for help you wouldn't have even tried to find me." Angel nodded his agreement, "You're right I wouldn't have. I wouldn't have because I thought that you had enough sense in your head to go straight home and not fall asleep outside after dark when no one knew where you were." Angel didn't know when he had started shouting, but who could blame him when his boy acted so stupid. "Don't you DARE take that tone with me you bastard." Xander spoke calmly. Anger, hurt, and sadness seeping into his voice, "You have no right, you gave that up two years ago when you left without even a good-bye. I've been taking care of myself for that long without any help from you and I'll continue to do so now and the next time you decide to just disappear!"

Xander had not raised his voice once when speaking to Angel nor did he look at him once making it all the harsher. It felt like Xander had just ripped his un-beating heart right out of his chest. "What do you mean without a good-bye, I left you a note." Angel whispered defeated. Xander laughed a hard, cold sound, "Oh yes, how very romantic, 'you can live here its paid for, oh and I think you should find someone new soon too.' I'm sorry I should have seen that for the heart felt and romantic good-bye between lovers that it was."

Angel inwardly flinched, there had been so much he had wanted to say, but he couldn't it would have put Xander in even more danger then he already was. "Let's not do this right now, just let me take you back to the apartment where you'll be safe." Xander turned to stare at Angel, **Could he really believe that I would stay in that apartment without him**, "No thanks, I'll make it home just fine!" Xander spat as he pushed past Angel. Sighing Angel followed behind to make sure that he got home all right. Xander knew Angel was following him, and he smiled Angel would hate this. When he came to the intersection where if he went to the left he would go to the apartment or if he went to the right he would go to his parents house, he took and immediate right. Hoping his father was asleep or passed out drunk.

Angel couldn't believe it, even as Xander snuck into the basement through the back door, he had moved back into his parent's house. **He's lucky those assholes haven't killed him yet.** With a sigh and a shake of his head he turned to find Willow and Buffy behind. Willow looked worried and scared, Buffy looked board. "Did you find him?" Willow asked. Angel nodded and motioned to the house, "He's safely inside." Willow sighed with relief, "Thank God" Buffy twirled a piece of her hair around her finger, "See I told you he'd be fine." She turned to Angel, "Can we go now?" She whined. Angel nodded even as he felt himself shiver with disgust, **How can she not care about someone she calls friend? **Willow gave them both a smile and wave as she headed home. Angel gave the house one last glance before letting Buffy pull him away. **Oh Xander, baby, I wish I could tell you everything.**

**Flash Back**

Angel hummed the stupid tune that Xander had been playing this morning, suddenly a smile spread across his face just thinking about his boy made him smile. He continued through the sewer heading home, with his birthday gift for Xander, when he heard someone coming up behind him. Quickly moving to blend better with the shadows, he waited for the person behind him to catch up. To say he was shocked was an understatement, walking confidently through the sewer was a young female about 5'5 long black hair down to her waist and midnight night blue eyes. She was dressed in gold and black and extremely beautiful. But what worried him the most was that she smelled like the Rom, a gypsy.

"Hello Master Vampire, I wish to speak with you." Her voice was like a cool spring breeze. Angel stepped from the shadows, "What can I do for of the magic race?" he said with a bow. The girl smiled at him "I come to give you a warning, my people do not believe you have suffered enough." Angel's spine stiffened, "What do you mean?" Her smile faded, "They have learned that you have found something that makes you happy, they plan to take that from you." Angel's chest felt tight, "Take it away?" the girl nodded looking sad "How?" Angel's voice was hard, angry. "They will take him, torture him and make you watch, listen." The barrowed blood in his veins ran cold "No!" it was a strangled cry, "they can't he is an innocent in this he doesn't even know about how I got my soul!"

Tears had gathered within the girl's eyes. "I know, and I know a way to save him." Angel looked surprised then desperate, "How?" "I'm afraid that this, for you, is a no win situation. Either way they win. You must leave Master Vampire, now and without thought about explanation. He can never know the reason behind your leaving, for his suffering will cause you great torment. It will appease them." Angel shook his head "This can't be happening, I can't do that to him." "But you must Master Vampire, or he'll suffer far worse." Angel's angry glare found her, "And why do you offer me this 'easier' way out, what will your people do to you if they find out?"

The girl couldn't hold his stare long; "My father blamed you for my sisters death, when I know the truth." Angel's eye's widened **It couldn't be!** "My sister fell in love with one of your kind, but he wasn't old enough to sire a childe of his own yet, being only a few years old. They begged you to turn her so that they could be together forever. But your sire found out and she came to our camp and told my father that you had killed my sister. The men of my camp quickly set out to find you. But your sire got to you first and told you that is you didn't act the way she wanted and drain my sister she would let my people take your childe, your William, my sisters love. Yet by some mysterious way you tricked your sire, were able to turn my sister and let my people take you instead. Your sire didn't know you were able to turn my sister, so when my people took her body she didn't try to stop them. You had hoped William would find her body before she awakened and they would be together, but that didn't happen, William believed the story your sire told, the one written in the 'Watcher's Dairy's.' That is why you left them, not because your sire ordered you away but because your favorite childe refused to acknowledge your existence. I know this because my sister told me it all upon her awaking; I was at her grave when she came out of it. I hid her and took care of her for as long as I could. And when my people found out they made me, not a vampire, but an immortal with vampire vulnerabilities, but a mortal's weakness. They will do nothing to me, I suffer for my sin."

Angel's eyes were wide, tears came to his eyes, "I hadn't known she survived, I thought she had perished that night." He blinked back tears, "But how can I hurt Xander like that, I love him!" The girls tears continued to fall, "I know, but all I can I can promise is that I'll watch over him, keep him out of harms way. Now you must go, they near here and the one that makes you happy. GO! NOW!"

Do you like it? Should I continue? Please review and let me know!


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I own nothing related to Buffy the Vampire Slayer

I'm so sorry that it took me so long to get this chapter up, but I've had so much schoolwork lately that I've barely had enough time to breath! So I hope you enjoy this chapter!

Chapter 2

Xander couldn't believe it, here he was just about to hull off and punch Buffy in her 'I'm so perfect' face when a slim but strong arm wrapped around his waist and pulled him back against a well-muscled chest and outside the Bronze. A face brushed against his hair, "Ya smell like 'im mate, he's bitten you." Xander stiffened **not another vampire! **Turning his head to get he got a glimpse of blond hair, blue eyes, and fangs. "Shit," he mumbled causing the blond holding him to chuckle. Xander's head whipped back around as he heard his name being yelled, "No, Willow, go back inside, run, NOW!" he yelled to the red head running towards them.

Willow came to a stop as she saw Xander held by a very handsome young man, **Awwww, Xan's got a new boyfriend**. She started to run over to them to warn them that Buffy was looking for Xander, but she caught a glimpse of fangs and became a little worried. Calling his name she came to a stop at his yelled command, "Oh God, BUFFY!" she screamed causing both Xander and the blond vamp to curse. Buffy came running out of the Bronze took one glace and smiled "Oh look another walking pile of ash!" She sneered, taking up a defensive stance. "Do me a favor," Xander whispered only loud enough for the vampire to hear, "and kick her ass!" This caused the vampire to laugh and push Xander behind him "Don't go no where, I'll only catch you again!" he warned. Xander knew it was true, there was no way he was any match for vampire speed.

"You must be the slayer, yea?" Buffy nodded, "and you are, not that I care but I need to record your dusting in the books." The blond growled, "Spike," Buffy laughed, "Spike how'd you come up with that name?" Spike smiled evilly, "Like to kill people with rail, road spikes." Buffy paled a little and the fight was on. It only lasted about 15 minuets and only achieved in getting both Buffy and Willow, who upon seeing Buffy in trouble tried to help, battered and bruised. Moving quickly Spike grabbed Xander again, holding him with Xander's back to his front. "Make sure you tell peaches that I've gotten myself a real nice nummy treat, and if he wants it back he'll have to come and get it." Then they were gone, Spike running down the street with Xander thrown over his shoulder.

Angel couldn't stop thinking about the night not even two weeks ago, seeing Xander again, see how much he had hurt him, and how much he is still hurting him. **God, Xan, baby, can you ever forgive me?** Thinking of Xander hurting made him remember that Xan was again living with his drunken, abusive parents, causing him to growl low in his throat. This caused Willow to glance quickly at him. "Giles," Willow looked back at the Watcher, who had his nose stuck in a book, "could you talk to Xander and see if he'll tell you what's wrong?" Giles gave the worried looking red head a confused look, "Pardon?" Willow blushed, "Well it's just that he looks to you as a father figure and…" Giles cut her off, "No, no Willow what I meant was I hadn't noticed anything about the boy lately, what could be wrong with him?" "Well, Xander's been, well I don't know, not all here I guess. He's been missing school and awful lot lately, and if he doesn't miss he comes in late, his not so good grades have dropped drastically, he doesn't come to meetings any more he avoids me and Buffy, and he always looks so sad." Giles thought back over the last few weeks and he couldn't remember seeing Xander since the night he ran off, "I'll speak with him Willow." Willow smiled and left to meet Buffy at the Bronze.

Giles turned to Angel, who was staring off in to space, the silence stretched for what felt like hours but what was only few minuets. "What are you thinking Watcher?" Giles didn't respond for a moment then, "I was wondering what to do about Xander, and the reasons why Xander could or would be acting this way." Angel sighed "and what did you decide?" "I'm not certain, but I know it has something to do with you. It started on the night that you were introduced to us." Angel refused to meet the Watcher's eyes, "Buffy probably had it right, he's probably upset that I'm her boyfriend," **What you don't know is I feel the same way!**

The doors to the library burst open, cutting off what Giles was about to say. A battered Buffy and Willow came running in. "Giles we got a big problem!" Buffy yelled. Giles jumped up, while Angel didn't move until Willow's comment was heard, "He took Xander!" Angel felt the blood in his veins run cold and freeze. He jumped and quickly moved to Willow's side helping her sit down. "Who did?" Angel asked taking past the lump in his throat. Buffy was the one to answer, "Vampire, strong one." She was glaring at Angel for not helping her. Angel turned to look at her and took a deep breath, causing his eyes to shoot open, **William**, it may have been over a hundred years but he knew his childe's scent, **No it couldn't be William would never…would he?**. "What did he look like?" his voice calm, not betraying the emotions building up inside of him. "About this high," she motioned with her hand, "blond hair blue eyes, fangs." She turned back to Giles who was dressing her wounds. Angel growled at the half hearted description, he turned back to Willow, who picked up where Burry left off. "he was wearing black leather pants, a red silk shirt, with a black leather duster, oh and he spoke with a British accent." "Yeah you think from his dress style he'd have better taste then to go for Xander, I mean…" She trailed off, as a growling Angel appeared only a few inches from her face, "What was his name?" Buffy's eyes went wide, **What the hell?** "I…I…" she stuttered, "Spike," Angel looked back at Willow, "He called himself Spike."

I'm sorry that this chapter is so short, I promise to write more soon. I only have about 18 days left of school so I'll have more time to write! I hoped you enjoyed this chapter, tell me what you think!


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I don't own any thing remotely related to Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

I'd like to thank all of you who have reviewed this story; you have helped me to create a better story. And I like to say how sorry I am that it's taken me so long to up date but after school got out I started working and my time was even less then when I was in school. Thanks again for your patience.

"Spoken"

**Thoughts**

Chapter 3

Having passed out sometime during the mad dash away from the Bronze, Xander awoke to being chained to a wall in what appeared to be a basement. "Ya finally up then mate?" Xander looked towards the voice and saw the blonde vampire from earlier sitting down at a table. Xander gave a dry laugh, "guess it wasn't a dream after all." Spike tilted his head "That's it?" now it was Xander's turn to be confused. "I mean no, 'oh why me?' or 'why didn't ya take the one he's datin' ya wanker!'" Xander gave a small but true laugh at that, "who do you think I am Buffy?" Spike's lips nearly formed a smile, "I'm serious, that's all the reaction I get after I gave all that effort to nab ya?" Xander couldn't help but start to like this vampire, they had the same sick sense of humor. "A, you'd only get the legendary 'Xander babble' if I were scared for my life…" With in a blink of and eye Spike was vamped out and only a hairs breath away form Xander's face, "Not scared huh mate?" Xander shook his head completely unfazed by Spike's vampric display. This caused Spike to take a step back tilting his head slightly "why not?" Xander sighed, "well as I was saying; B, been kidnapped by demons before. And because you're using me as bait, for who I'm guessing Angel since he's the only vampire I know right know, and as any good fisher knows live worm catches more fish then a dead one." Spike laughed "you're smarter then you act mate, why?" Xander sighed and leaned his head back against the wall, "if you let me out of these chairs I'll tell you.

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Buffy, Giles, and Willow watched as Angel passed back and forth mumbling to himself. Buffy leaned over to Giles to whisper in his ear, "What's up with Angel, he's taking Xander's kidnapping awfully hard for someone I thought hated him." Giles shook his head "I haven't the slightest idea." This caused Angel to glare and growl at them, and then sighed as all three of the jumped away from him. "I just never expected him to stoop this low, he was always…" Angel sighed and cut himself off before he could say what he truly felt, these people wouldn't understand. "Who?" dared a confused and scared Willow. Angel gave another sigh, "William," he whispered as he nearly fell into the chair beside Willow. "William," Giles asked, "as in William the Bloody?" All the color drained from his face, "Who's William the Bloody?" Buffy asked confused about what this William the Bloody had to do with this Spike character. Angel looked at Giles as if he were dumb. "As in William the Bloody favorite Childe of Angelus Scourge of Europe, later known as Spike for his fondness of killing people with railroad spikes." Buffy was still confused, so it was Willow who made the connection, "Angelus, Angel…" she whispered before gasping, "You're his sire! You're Angelus!" Angel sighed and nodded at the girl, "Yes Willow, I will am, or rather was Angelus. I didn't always have a soul. I was once a vampire in every sense of the word." Buffy finally made sense of it all, "Childe as in you're his Sire, like you created him?" Angel nodded distractedly. This caused Buffy to laugh, drawing all eyes to her, "I always knew you had good taste and meeting Spike with is amazing fashion sense just proved it. What with his silk shirts and leather pants and his gelled back hair. Very stylish." This caused the other three to roll their eyes. Angel sighed, "He couldn't change so much since I saw him last." A voice came from the door way causing Giles, Buffy and Willow to jump ready to fight, Angel only turned to address the new comer. "And you are right, Master Vampire, but then again neither has Drusilla." "Drusilla?" Angel whispered, "What does Drusilla have to do any of this?" the girl moved further into the room ignoring the stares for the other three people of the room instead focusing on Angel. "Blood laced blood, a powerful spell, one not easily countered." Angel jumped with a roar, causing everyone but the girl to jump in alarm. "She's taken his mind? I'll kill her!" the girl gave a small smile "but will not break the spell, in fact it'll only make the spell permanent." Angel sighed, "I know but it was a nice thought." This caused the girl to laugh softly "One full of blood and fun I would wager." Angel just shrugged. "So magic one, how do I break this blood spell?" Angel knew she wouldn't come here unless she knew. She smiled but it was not her that answered, "Confuse the mind, bring in an element that only the heart can understand."

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Spike tilted his head considering the young man chained to his wall. "Alright." There wasn't anywhere the whelp could escape anyway. He unchained Xander and gestured towards the table, "Have a seat mate." Xander sat gratefully. "Thanks, chains and walls get really lame after the first couple of times." Spike pushed a glass of water at him, "so mate, lets hear the story then." "Well it started…

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Sorry got to go for know. Hope you like the new chapter. Sorry that it's so short. I'll update soon if there are still people interested so send me some feed back on what you think. All opinions are welcome.


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I don't own Buffy or anything involved around the Vampire Slayer show. I'm so sorry that it took me so long to update but I'm truly grateful for all those who continue to read. This chapters for all of you!!! Thanks again and keep reading!!!

Chapter 4

"Well it all started a almost three years ago."

Flash Back

"Dad I didn't do anything!" Xander cryed as his father continued to beat him.

"Don't lie to me boy! I saw you making out with boy! No son of mine is going to be a funkin' faggot!"

"But dad I'm not!" Tony Harris picked up the bruised and bloody mess that was Xander and threw him out the front door. "Don't you dare come back unless you're ready to act like a man!" and with that he slammed the door.

Xander shivered as he lay on the front lawn of his house. He knew that he had to get out of there before day break because having the neighbors talk would only make his father anger worse. He was able to drag himself to the street before he collapsed from the blood lose and the pain. When he woke up, apparently several hours later, he found himself in a warm bed and his wounds tended. "Where am I?" Xander asked himself. Just then the door, to what Xander guessed was a bedroom, and in walked the hottest guy he had ever seen.

Over 6 feet of solid muscle with dark brown to black hair he couldn't tell, and the guy had the deepest brown eyes that Xander had ever seen. The man stood there in black sweats and towel drying his hair. "Oh good you're awake. How are you feeling?" the man asked as he walked towards the bed.

"Uh…better thank you." "Good I'm glad when I found you I thought that you might be lost to this world."

Xander blushed as this guy started checking his bandages. "Um, this might sound like an odd question, but who are you?" The man flushed him a smile that made his breath catch in his throat.

"Forgive my poor manners Alexander, I am Angel. I came upon you last night on my way home. I would have taken you home but your school ID did not give your address." Angel explained as he finished dressing Xander's wounds.

"That wouldn't have been a good idea anyway." Xander mumbled under his breath.

"So Alexander how did you come across such injuries?"

"Got beat."

"By who?" Xander stayed quite hoping that he would just let it go.

Angel sighed, "All right, but you shouldn't move for a few days. Now should I call your parents or should I stop by your house later?"

Panic entered Xander's heart, "NO!!!"

Angel just nodded his understanding. "Is there someone else you can contact about this?" Xander nodded and Angel handed him a cell phone.

"Hey Willow, yea I know I missed school today. No nothing serious. Yea I've got a place to stay for a few days. Thanks Wills you're the best. Bye."

Angel smiled at Xander as he handed him back his phone, "Now what would you like to eat?"

End Flash Back

"Hello Sire, it is good to see you again."

"Childe" Angel whispered. Faster then a blink of an eye Angel was across the room and pulled the new comer into a fierce hug. "I'd always hoped, but I couldn't bring myself to believe." Angel whispered, "Esmerelda, my childe."

As the hug dragged on Buffy became more and more agitated. **Who was this girl and if she thought that she could come in here and take her Angel she had another thing coming.** "Just who is this tramp?" Buffy asked Willow in not quite a whisper.

The growl coming from the door way cut off any response that Willow might have made.

"Young Slayer, I would not insult my sister again." The gypsy girl said.

"And just what do you think you can do about it?" Buffy asked with a sneer.

"It's not her that you need to fear Buffy." Angel said as in game face he strode over to stand in front of her. "I don't care who you are, I will not stand for people insulting my family!" he snarled.

Buffy was shocked, this wasn't her please pity me Angel, she just stood there with her mouth agape.

"Angel please control yourself this isn't going to help us rescue Xander." Giles said calmly even as he clutched his cross that was in his coat pocket tighter.

Angel growled once more before moving to stand between he childe and her sister. It was only after he slid an arm around the waist of each girl that his game face disappeared.

"Now you mentioned some sort of plan?" Giles asked while keeping an eye on his slayer who was getting angrier with every passing moment.

"Yes, and I wish I could take the credit but it was my sister Megara who realized what was happening to William. We have spent the last century trying to find a way to counter he spell."

"Why didn't you come to me? I would have helped you." Angel said in a sad voice.

Which caused Esmerelda to give her sire a hug, "I would have, Sire, if I could have. But my clan thought me dead and they watched you so closely I knew I wouldn't be able to fool and fight them again. So I focused on William I figured together we would stand a chance."

"Aye, Zelda you thought right." Angel said affectionately as he kissed her forehead.

"Can we please get back to the job at hand?" Buffy sneered at them. After this she was going to send this little slut packing.

"The plan is simple, first we discover where William is hiding."

"Oh I can help with that," Willow perked up realizing that she could help her oldest friend, " the simple locater spell that I found last week should do the trick. But I'll need to run to the Magic Box cause I don't have all the ingredients."

"I'll go with you," Meg said, "I'm very skilled at locater spells perhaps together it will work faster." Willow smiled and nodded, leading the way out of the library.

"So tell me, what's life like as a gypsy?" Willow asked as they walked out.

Zelda laughed as the two left, "I am glad that Meg has found a friend and the little red head reminds me of her."

Angel nodded, "Willow will be good for her."

Flash Back

"Move in with me Xander." Angel said. It had been almost three months since Angel had first pulled off the street.

"I don't know Angel," Xander said, "if my father was to find out in anyway…" he tailed off as Angel pulled him into a tight hug.

"I won't let anyone hurt you, I promise!" Xander smiled against Angel's chest.

"Forever?" Xander asked shyly.

"For eternity." Angel said as he leaned down and gave Xander a gentle kiss.

End Flash Back

"Oh we got him!" Meg and Willow yelled at the same time causing them to giggle and Angel and Zeldie to smile at them.

"He is in an abandoned house on the outskirts of town." Willow said.

Angel nodded "That sounds like William, practical not flashy."

Buffy sighed "So what's step 2 to this almighty plan?"

Zelda looked at her with cold eyes, "Now my Sire, my sister, myself, and possibly young Willow go to get William and young Xander. You and the watcher stay here."

Buffy was shaking her head, "No way, I'm going to go stake me some vamps!"

"And what about Xander, Buffy?" Angel asked. "Not once in this whole time have you mentioned saving Xander."

Buffy's mouth was hanging open, never has Angel ever questioned her motives, "Of course I want to rescue Xander but I can't do that if we just let the ones who took him go free."

Angel shook his head, "Sorry Buffy but you're not coming."

Giles grabbed her arm before she could start and argument, "We'll wait for you phone call that Xander is safe." With that Angel, Zelda, Meg, and Willow left.

Flash Back

Xander sat alone in the now empty bedroom of what was once his and Angel's apartment. Holding the picture and shirt that that he had found. "What did I do wrong Angel?" Xander asked the empty room, "I thought that you loved me." Xander felt the tears start to fall again and tried to shake them away. As he turned to leave he thought that he felt someone watching him, he took one more look around the apartment trying to find who was there, but saw no one. "I should have known that this was all a dream and dreams don't last, not for me." Xander walked out of the apartment closing the door on the dream he had lived for the past nine months without another backwards glance.

End Flash Back

Spike put out his fag in the table, "Bugger mate, that just…"

"Sucks?" Xander cut him off, "Yeah I know."

"And then to have him come back datin' one of yer mates? Now that's hell." Spike said sadly. Xander just nodded his head. "You have just as much reason to hate him as I do."

This got a curious look from Xander, "Why do you hate Angel so much?"

"It's a long story…"

"Actually it's longer then you think, Vampire." A new voice said from the stairs.


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: I don't own anything connected to Buffy the Vampire Slayer!

Thank you everyone who has reviewed by story, I'm so glad you like it! Well here's the next chapter!!!

Chapter 5

"Hello Drusilla, did you sleep well?" Spike asked the new arrival.

Drusilla giggled as she danced down the stairs, "a pressie for me?" she asked as she came to stand beside Xander.

"No Dru, not for you." Spike said with a sigh.

This caused Drusilla to pout, "but I'm a Princess" she said while caressing Xander's neck causing him to shudder with fear.

"That you are pet, but he is no meal, not yet anyway, he's our ticket to Angelus." Spike said as if talking to a child.

Drusilla pulled her hand away as if burned, "Dirty soul has marked him! Dirty, dirty, must wash!" She screamed clawing at her had 'til she drew blood.

Spike jumped up to stop her, "Easy Dru," he said taking her hand into his licking the blood away, "you're not dirty, you're beautiful."

Dur giggled again, "My sweet, my little Spike, you'll stay with me not like my daisy's."

Spike smiled at her "Of course Princess"

A gagging sound brought their attention to the stairs where Angel stood, leaning against the railing. "Oh please, I've seen better in those damn chick flick films."

"Angelus"

"Daddy"

Spike and Drusilla said at the same time.

"I was wondering when you'd chose to show up Deadboy." Xander said which earned him three different growls, "Ok, geez, I get it family matter." He said holding his hands up, in mock surrender.

"Xander I want you to come here." Angel said without showing any of the fear that was trying to clog his throat. He had to get Xander away from Dursilla, "NOW!!!"

Xander sighed as he stood up, but he hadn't even taken two steps before strong arms pulled him backwards, "No kitten you stay with Princess." Drusilla whispered in his ear, before licking it.

"Drusilla, let him go or I swear that I'll stake you myself." Angel growled.

Spike stepped in front of Drusilla and Xander, "If you want them you have to come through me."

Angel growled in warning, "William I don't want you hurt, now mover aside!"

Spike laughed coldly, "Hurt? You already hurt me beyond any dimension of hell ever could, the night…"

"The night that I killed Esmerelda, your one and only true love." Angel cut Spike off harshly.

Tears came unbidden to Spikes eyes and caused Angel's resolve to shake, **No I have to do this for William and Xander both.**

"Then you admit then, you did kill her!" he sounded like a small sad and scared child which in reality he truly was.

Angel sighed in aspiration, "Of course I killed her William, it was what both you and she had asked for."

"NO, no that's not what we asked for!" Spike yelled as tears leaked down his face, "We asked you to give her a new life, you bastard!"

Angel nodded "Yes William, but to be granted new life you must first leave the one you live first."

"But you didn't giver her new life, you just took the one she had!" Spike yelled.

Angel raised an eyebrow in question, "Did I?" he smirked as he held out his hand and down walked his third childe, who took Angel's hand and allowed herself to be pulled into his arms.

"Hello William, my love."


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: I don't own anything connected to Buffy the Vampire Slayer!

Thank you everyone who has reviewed by story, I'm so glad you like it! Well here's the next chapter!!!

Chapter 6

"Esmerelda? Is it possible?" Spike whispered in shock, as he took a step closer.

"Tricky, tricky, daddy," giggled Drusilla from behind Spike causing him to stop.

"Won't work daddy, see through you, I do." She giggled again.

This caused Angel to laugh harshly, "Drusilla you truly are insane if you think you can come between their love."

Drusilla smiley sweetly, "Spike love Princess," she purred as she pulled Xander closer caressing his hair. "And soon kitten will be a beautiful black daisy!"

"Umm…Deadboy don't want to sound pushy, but mind getting me out of here before I become a flower?" Xander asked calmly not betraying the fear that Angel could see in his eyes and smell coming off him.

Angel growled loudly, "You put one fang anywhere near him and I swear I'll stake you faster then you can scream!" He spoke in a deathly calm. The cold tone caused shivers of fear to run down everyone's spines.

"Hold on just a sec and back it up!" Spike said moving to stand between Angel and Drusilla, "There will no' be any staking of anyone until I get some answers!" he was running his hands through his hair, a nervous gesture let over from his human days.

Zelda walked up to him taking his hands in hers, she looked him in the eye, "My William," she whispered brushing his cheek with her hand. "You have been betrayed but not by the one you think."

Spike stared at her wide eyes taking a step back, "I do no' understand, how can you be alive?"

"The night before I was to be turned I awoke to my fathers voice raised in argument with the tones of a female. I snuck outside and hide behind a tree close to where they were standing. There were two women speaking with him, one was a small delicate looking blond, they other a frail dark haired beauty."

Drusilla hissed "lies, lies ugly lies!" She dug her claws into Xander's arms, with him letting out a quite gasp of pain, earning them both an interruptive look from Angel.

Flash Back

"You heard me Rom King, a vampire by the name of Angelus is coming to kill your eldest daughter." Darla said earning a quite giggle from Drusilla, but not the crazy insane giggle the vampire usually let out, a giggle full of the love for pain.

"Why should I believe you woman?" the king of the gypsies asked.

"She's been sneaking around after dark, yes? That is how he gets all his young victims, seduction." Darla said as if she were instructing a small child.

The king sucked in a loud breath as he analyzed his daughter's behavior over the last few weeks, "Then we shall kill him before he lays a hand upon my daughter again." He yelled.

Esmerelda gasped softly drawing the gaze of the dark haired vampire to her hiding spot. **I have to warn William and Angelus.** She thought to herself. With her decision made she ran. She knew where to find them, she hoped.

Esmerelda sighed as she exited the house where William and she had always met. "William where are you?" she was near tears thinking that she would be to late.

"I do believe that he is preparing for tomorrow my dear." A voice came from behind her startling her so much that she jumped about three feet in the air.

Turning she saw Angelus leaning against the wall with a half smile on his face, which fell quickly when he saw the tears within her eyes. Within the blink of an eye he was holding her in his arms.

"Oh childe what is wrong?" Angelus asked in a whisper as he kissed her hair.

Esmerelda smiled over the term childe, but soon lost it when she remembered her father. "My father plans to kill you before tomorrow night! You and William have to leave now!" The tears finally fell.

Angelus brushed them away, "Hush sweetling, hush just tell me everything and I'll shall take care of it."

After telling him what she saw in her village she cried into his chest. "Shhh…sweetling, it shall be alright." He whispered before he started to purr, in hopes of calming her down. After she calmed down a bit Angelus smiled down at her with a sad smile.

"I had feared that they would try something. They two ye saw in your village were my sire and my first childe. When William told them about you they didnea take it verra well. Darla told me that I was to kill ye if I wished to stay in her good graces, and Drusilla was angry at the chance of having her play toy taken away."

Esmerelda sighed, "What do we do now?" she asked doing as he said and letting him make all the decisions and deal with the problems.

"We move up our plans," he stated simply. "And then instead of our whole family moving together just ye, William and myself shall be leaving, perhaps to my homeland. I do so miss the sights, sounds, and smells of Ireland." Angelus said as he pulled her closer exposing her neck. "Now ye become family." He bit down draining her. He felt his sire coming his way. "Drink my childe, drink and become one of us." He whispered, holding his bleeding wrist to her mouth.

End of Flash Back

Spike stared at Esmerelda in shock after she finished telling him her story, he then looked passed her to see his sire looking on with a look full of sadness, love, and hope of understanding.

"You turned her that night?"

Angel nodded, "Yes William I did. When I was confronting Darla you came out of the ally."

Flash Back

Angelus gently placed Esmerelda's now lifeless body on the ground.

"Sleep well Childe, for when you awaken there willnea be much time to rest."

He whispered then stood up. His Sire was nearing them faster then he liked, and she would know that he had turned Esmerelda the feeling of family would give it away. Angelus smiled slyly as he recalled something that his old friend, Dracula, had taught him on their last trip to Romania. Angelus closed his eyes focusing all his energy on masking Esmerlda's scent and presence from his bloodline, no one would know that the lifeless body in front of was a newly bitten vampire.

Just as he finished, Darla came around the corner, **Time to test this trick**, Angelus thought. And when Darla just raised her delicate eyebrow at the now dead gypsy, Angelus smiled widely knowing that he had been able to protect his newest Childe from his Sires evil hands. Then a sinking feeling feel across him as another presence caught his senses. William. **Please stay away William, please**.

But his pleading was to go unanswered as he saw William emerge from the ally only to stop in his tracks at the sight that he saw. Angelus sighed heavily inwardly, there was no turning back now however, no matter what else happened he had to protect his newest Childe.

"You seem surprised m'dear, did you not wish me to kill the Rom Princess?" Angelus asked silkly, with a smile in his voice.

Darla smiled happily as she laughed, "Oh I never should have doubted you, my darling boy, you will always choose me won't you?"

Angelus bowed his head just a little in respect, "Ye are my Sire, without ye I wouldnea be here."

Darla stepped closer and gently drew her hand down his cheek, only to slap him with all her might yet it only caused Angelus's head to snap to the left, "and don't you ever forget that fact, my boy, if you ever disobey me like you have done in the last few weeks you will truly die!"

Angelus just smiled at her which caused her to smile as well, but what was about to be said went unheard as footsteps could be heard running towards them. The King of the Rom was the first to be seen followed by the men of his tribe. Angelus could smell the anger, sadness, and hatred rolling off the men and he smiled.

"You, woman, where is the one who has done this?" he asked as he walked towards the body of his daughter.

Angelus watched the man approach the body of his youngest Childe and fought the growl that threatened to erupt from him at the man who dared to touch what belonged to him. But at the same moment he saw Darla look toward where William was still standing watching with mouth agape and eyes filled with tears. And he cursed, Angelus just knew that she was going to try to pin this on his William and that could not be allowed.

So his decision made Angelus laughed, a laugh full of mocking. "Ye should be pleased her life was taken by the strongest of the bloodline, Angelus. Oh and I should tell ye that her blood was delectable and it causes me to wonder is it a trait just she has or her family or perhaps her whole clan? Now that is a mystery I would love to sink my teeth into." Angelus said with a snarl flashing his fangs at them. Causing them to gasp.

"You will pay vampire," the King said with a deathly calm, "You will suffer for all eternity. Death is to good for the likes of you!" With that the men formed a circle around the two vampires, and started to chant in a language unknown to Angelus. He became suddenly wary when Darla fled the circle the men not bothering to stop her, she wasn't who they were after. Before Angelus had time to ponder what might be happening, he felt a tightness in his chest around his heart that quickly spread throughout his entire body forcing him to his knees and a scream to escape him before falling completely to the ground.

As he laid there withering in pain he watched as the men quietly gathered the body of Esmerelda and carried it away. Then he saw Darla rush to William, who at some point was joined by Drusilla. Taking Dursilla by the hand and with one last hate filled glare at Angelus's crumpled form took off down the ally, calling for William to follow. Angelus felt like his heart was crushed by the look his William was giving him. Tears still filled and fell from his eyes, but it was a mixture of pain, hurt, anger, and worst of all hate.

As quickly as he could Angelus gained his feet and ran as fast as he could in the opposite direction, away from the hate filled eyes of his favorite Childe, and for the first time in many a year he felt his own tears spill from his eyes.

End of Flash Black

Thank you to all who have reviewed your confidence and enjoyment in this story have really helped, please keep reviewing and with school out for the summer I'll be able to write more I promise!!! Again please review all opinions are welcome!!!! Bye for now!!!


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: Don't own, not mine

Disclaimer: Don't own, not mine. Damn!

Chapter 7

Spike couldn't believe what he was hearing, wasn't sure he dared to hope that any of it was true, but he wanted to more then anything he wanted to. But he had suffered to many hurts in his life then his un-life and some at the hands of this very man. And then factor in what he did to the boy, it just didn't make sense for him to believe Angel, Xander was proof that Angel had purposely hurt people that he claimed to love.

"You truly expect me to believe this rot?" Spike sneered at them. "I don't do blind faith anymore, prove it. Until then the boy stays with us, but after hearing his story I wonder if he even wants to go with ya."

Angel growled low in his throat at Spike, **how dare he question me, I'm his sire!** "the boy doesn't have a choice and whether or not you want to believe it what we've said here tonight is the truth. You want proof, fine you'll have it. But make no mistake my boy, this is the one and only time you can't except my word then…" he shrugged but the underling threat got through causing Spike to shiver in slight fear.

Angel closed his eyes and concentrated on the link with his youngest childe, finding the feelings and scents of family, and grabbed them pulling them to the surface until they were filling the room. Spike just stared in shock, to stunned to even be happy. But Drusilla acted like she was hit in the chest, stumbling back a few steps, causing her grip on Xander to losen. His eyes narrowed as he debated the best way to get away from the psycho vampire.

Suddenly Spikes eyes filled with tears and he closed the distance between his self and Esmeralda, pulling her tight to his chest closing his eyes he drank in her scent; magic and power mixed with a lighter scent of sunlight and flowers. It was his Zelda, there was no doubt in his mind anymore. Opening his eyes he stared into hers for a brief moment with love, excitement, and happiness, before crushing their lips together in a lip bruising, filled with deep passion and longing, kiss.

"NO!" Screamed Drusilla as a black light surrounded an unknowing Spike, it pulsed once before it seemed to materialize and rush at her. Xander stared wide eyed as it slammed into him, the into Drusilla pushing her away from Xander and into the wall. Everything seemed to go to slow motion for him in that moment as he sank to the floor, the roar from Angel, the shocked looks of Zelda, Spike crumpling unconscious to the floor, his knees hitting the cold cement. Just as his vision went black a pair of strong arms surrounded him, and a voice spoke in his ear.

"I've got you Xan, don't worry, baby, I've got you."

Angel cradled the unconscious boy to his chest, staring at his childe's fallen form, the fear and anger he felt fighting for dominance. Anger, of course, winning out. He turned to glare at Drusilla as she stood to shaking legs.

"Leave, and if you know what's good for you, you'll get out of town before I hunt you down and stake you just like I did that lying bitch Darla." He snarled. Drusilla just snarled back but was wise enough to race out of the basement. Angel gently lifted Xander into his arms, as he looked to Zelda he saw her lift Spike as well with a nod they made their way upstairs where the other two waited.

Willow started to cry the moment she saw the unconscious Xander. She looked at Angel the unasked question in her eyes, Angel just shook his head he didn't know what was wrong or how to fix it. Together the group made their way to the mansion that Angel had claimed for himself.

Quickly he made his way upstairs to his room,

"The room beside this one is free and clean, put William there, at least he will rest comfortably." Zelda nodded and quickly swept passed her sire and disappeared through the door.

Angel as carefully as possible, laid the still Xander on his bed. He turned to Meg, desperation in his eyes,

"What happened, what is wrong with him?" his voice nearly chocked with tears. Meg shook her head sadly.

"I wish I knew, perhaps a diagnostic spell would be the best place to start, but with my power level as it is I can not possible accurately cast it."

"Maybe I could help. . ." came the hesitant voice of Willow. Drawing the others eyes to her, one gaze curiously calculating and the other desperately helpless and hopeful.

"Yes . . . yes, it might just work" Meg said nodding with a small smile. Angel quickly moved out of their way as both Willow and Meg stepped up beside the bed with a determined look and step. Quietly mumbling as they placed their hands over Xander's chest, a blue glow surrounded Xander for a slight moment before pulsing black and throwing Willow and Meg across the room.

Angel raced over to them and helped them up,

"What is it, what happened?"

Willow was in shock as was Meg never had they encountered a magical shield so strong before. Meg shook her head,

"I have no idea, he has a magical shield around him" she informed Angel sadly. Willow once again began to cry,

"That means we can not reach him." She wailed pitifully, Meg quickly wrapped her in a tight hug.

"Don't worry Willow, we'll figure it out, we'll help your Xander – shaped friend. I promise."

Angel moved to sit on the bed beside his boy and gently and lovingly brushed the hair from his eyes and face.

"Perhaps, that watcher would know what to do Sire." Came Zelda's voice from the doorway. Angel nodded and retrieved his cell phone from his coat pocket.

"I need to let him know that we got Xander away from Drusilla anyway."

"Giles"

"We successfully retrieved Xander from Drusilla, but there was a complication." Angel wasted no time in coming straight to the point.

"What kind of complication?" Giles asked fear interrupting his sigh of relief.

"When the spell on William was broken Drusilla was holding Xander. It passed through him and hit Dru, but now he is unconscious with a magical shield around him, we can not get a reading what is wrong with him." Angel sounded so defeated that it made Giles's heart stop.

"Where are you?" he demanded.

"My home, but we will come to you. I may have a soul and be on her good side, but I will not allow the slayer to know where I spend my days." Angel snapped the phone closed, and turned to the females in the room.

"Meg, Willow you will both accompany me to the school. Zelda you will stay here and look after William until he awakens. Then you will both meet up with us there unless I come back here first." He then moved to wrap his youngest childe in a tight embrace,

"This is now your home, anything you need will be seen to you have only to ask." He pulled back to look into her eyes.

"I refuse to allow my family to be broken again, if you clan comes for vengeance, we will fight and gain our freedom from them or die trying." His voice was determined and sandpaper rough taking on a light Irish accent. Tears filled Zelda's eyes as she whispered the most important word her sire had said,

"Home"

Angel quickly gathered Xander in his arms and ushered the two girls out ahead of him. Determination in his every step and movement, this was the last straw. He had nearly lost the most important person to him and suffered the hate from those he cared about to long. He was taking his life back, and soul or no soul he would kill who ever got in his way.

Oh what will happen? Will Spike forgive Angel for all the pain he's suffered? Will he get back together with Zelda or return to an old habit Dursilla? And what's wrong with Xander? Will he live? . . . die?

And what will Buffy do when her Angel stops acting like an obedient puppy?

Sorry that this chapter took so long, but I'm glad that so many people are enjoying my story and are demanding more! Hopefully I'll get new reviews soon!! ;)


	8. Chapter 8

Hey everyone!!! I'm so sorry that it's been so long between updates, but I've been having some major health issues, in and out of the hospital totally not fun!!! But now I'm back and I hope to make up for time lost! I'm so happy to see how many people want me to continue and have continued to wait for this update!!!

OK, so it's been brought to attention that I did not post the updated version of chapter one when I first posted it, and I really don't want to go back and do it again, I will if I have to so tell me if you want it changed. But here is the stuff that was left out: I changed the time line a little bit setting it directly after the end of the original movie so Buffy is a senior when she arrived at Sunnysdale, Xander when he was living with Angel was 17, not 14 and is now 19 (yes I know it's old to be in high school but hey I was 19 when I graduated, so it does happen!!!) because he started kindergarten a year later than normal because he actually moved to Sunnydale, that's not in the first chapter you actually learn that later, so now you're a head of the game! OK so the ick factor of chapter one is taken care of, on with the show!!!

Chapter 8

Giles stared at his slayer in an almost fear as she took out her frustration out on the punching bag, mumbling about ungrateful vampires and friends the entire time.

"What the hell is up with him?" she snarled at Giles, "I'm the fucking slayer! ME! I'm the one with the strength, the power! What does he see in Xander the fucking Zeppo? The boy who can't even fight off his own dad?"

Giles paled at her last sentence. "What do you mean Buffy? Why would he need to fight of his own father?"

Buffy looked at him like he was the dumbest thing on earth, "Come on Giles, you've had to have noticed. All the bruises and cuts from nights when he didn't go patrolling, missing days of school and coming back limping, all the broken ribs and bones. Plus the fact that everyone knows that his parents are drunk assholes who make him live in the basement "apartment" and pay rent."

Giles was white, franticly cleaning his glasses. "W . . . wh . . .what? How? . . . Why?" he stammered softly, feeling utterly sick.

Buffy tossed herself into a chair at the library table, "Oh please Giles, not you too. I'm the slayer, you're supposed to care about me, not some sidekick wannabe."

"Buffy!" Giles exclaimed shocked beyond anything that she would not care about a human being, her friend at that. "If you knew that young Xander was being abused why did you not tell anyone?" Shock giving into outrage.

"Why? Not like it was my problem. And besides that's what we have teachers for anyway, right, if they didn't notice then why should I bother?"

"Maybe BECAUSE you're the SLAYER," Angel's cold hard voice came from behind her. Buffy gasped as she turned to see Angel carefully cradling the unconscious Xander in his arms, with a disgusted Meg and a horrified Willow staring at her.

"Hey guys, you got him." She said with obviously fake enthusiasm, "Did you stake that Spike guy?"

"No Slayer," Angle growled as he moved to lay Xander on the table, "As I told you before it was never my intention to stake my childe but to free him from Drusilla."

Buffy huffed but made to approach them, hoping that a make-out session would make Angle forget her earlier words and behaviors, it always worked before. But Angel growled as he stepped away from her and into her path blocking her view of Xander. She stopped shocked, "Angel what's wrong?" she asked in concern, "you've never growled at me before." She turned a glare at Meg perhaps that gypsy bitch had spelled him against her.

But before Angel could reply or Buffy could put voice to her thoughts Willow stepped up to Buffy.

"You knew and you didn't care?" Willow's voice was tight with anger. "You knew what was going on in that hellhole of a house and you did nothing because it wasn't your problem?" she screamed.

Buffy stared in shock as the once meek, follow all orders Willow turned red with anger and hate, "It wasn't, I deal with demons, Vampire Slayer remember? Not Xander's personal bodyguard." Buffy was shouting now too, her anger getting far too out of control.

"You are the defender of the innocent Buffy! Your given duty is to protect mankind from monsters, and if Tony Harris isn't a monster then I don't know what is! Even if that wasn't your job he's your friend who has done nothing but support you and fight with you!" Willow was starting to glow now, not that normal eyes would catch it, but Angel's vampire eyes and Meg's and Giles's magic trained eyes did.

"**For Me** Willow, never with me! That boy is worthless in a fight and is always a distraction. The more I watch out for him the more vulnerable I become! Why do you think I've told him I don't want him hanging around patrolling anymore?"

"Do you care for Xander?" Willow's calm voice scared Buffy more then any demon could, and Buffy found that no matter how hard she tried that she couldn't look away from the other girls eyes nor could she move her body.

"Of . . .of course I do." Buffy stammered with lock of conviction. Angel could smell the lie like poison in the air causing him to growl and prepare to attack her only to be stopped my both Willow and Meg.

"She is mine" the red headed witch hissed. Meg came up behind the angry witch and carefully placed a comforting arm around her waist and then laid her hand over Willow's eyes. Meg watched as Buffy staggered and fell after being released from the magical hold.

"Let her go Willow, she's not worth your magical core," Meg whispered into the red head's ear softly. She didn't move from her position as she glared at the blond slayer. "Get out Buffy" she spoke in a hard voice that no one had ever heard from the small gypsy before.

"You have breached the contract of your power slayer," Meg's voice took on an unexpected strangely sweet quality, causing everyone took look at her with surprise, "Am I not correct Watcher?"

Giles blushed at the glare that Buffy sent his way, he had never wanted it to come to this. He knew what Meg was referring to although how she knew he didn't know. He again began to clean his glasses, "W . . . well yes you are."

"Giles!?" Buffy was stunned, everyone was turning on her.

"It states in the contract of the Chosen One (or the Slayer): that the Chosen One cannot cause harm to any member of the human race, whether it be through her own hand or by lack of action. If she has the knowledge of harm being done to another human, she must put a stop to it." Giles stated never meeting the blond's eyes.

"Get out Slayer." Angel fought his true face from showing, not wanting to prompt her to attack while Xander lay defenseless behind him.

Buffy looked at everyone, tears in her eyes, then locked on Angel's, "But Angel I . . ."

Angel turned his back on her, gently taking one of Xander's hand's and softly brushing the hair from his closed eyes. Buffy's eyes filled with hate as she watched this 'touching' scene.

"Leave and do so now!" Meg spoke fear filling her at the look the slayer sent Angel and Xander before she ran out of the library like the hounds of hell were at her heels. "She will cause you great trouble."

"But not right now, we will deal with that when the time comes, as a family." he drew her into a light hug as Giles moved to examine Xander.

"Oh William, my William, how I have missed you. When I first awoke and you weren't there I panicked, yes me, I panicked."

Zeldie giggled at the image that his face would have made at that statement.

"I looked everywhere for you, but you were already long gone. I thought you left me, you know, that you didn't want me anymore. I even tried to kill myself three times before my sister was able to make me understand what happened that night.

"So afterwards I went searching for you, and I found you. You were in Paris, France but you weren't me William anymore, but Spike and fully in love with Drusilla. I was crushed I told myself to speak to you, to figure out what was going on but my heart just wouldn't listen to my head.

"So I decided if you didn't want me then I would just leave this world and solve everyone's problem. I was waiting for the sun to rise at the Eiffel Tower, the locals say that it's the most romantic spot in Paris, I thought it was the best place to say goodbye to my love. But that wasn't meant to be you see waiting for my return in a little warehouse on the docks was my sister, Meg. Would you believe her luck, it was the same warehouse that Drusilla and Darla happened to pick to meet up with a mystic, a wizard.

"This mystic gave Drusilla a potion that was so black it looked like a void of space, according to Meg anyway. When she heard what it was and what they were doing she came running to find me and when I found out, oh how I wanted to rip their heads off! But I had to find out what the permanent effects and damages would be, what would happen to you, what actions I could do without causing you harm.

"It took me years, almost an entire century but by then I had no idea where you were and I was hiding from the decedents of my clan and protecting my little sister, you remember little Meg, she stood by me and helped me, cared for me and was punished by my father because of this, harshly. She now has the life time of a vampire, with the same weaknesses but also the weaknesses of the mortal life as well. But she's never regretted her decisions, and now she's developed a new ability, one not seen in our blood line in generations before us nor after us. The Sight.

"She saw you and our sire together in this town and I know it was now or never, I was going to free you, whether you took me back or not because my love for you has never lessened but only grew stronger with each passing year and each small bit of hearsay I heard of you. Or I was going to die trying."

Tears began to fall from her eyes as she gently kissed him with all her love and truth and hope in to the light brush of lips. As she pulled back she saw his eyelids flutter open and he smiled at her a full blown out loving smile.

"William?" Zeldie whispered in awe, as the bleached blond sat up gently tracing his fingers over her face, her eyes, her nose, her lips, her jaw, down to her neck hovering over the non-pulse point and turning mark. Zeldie's not needed breathing was becoming faster with each touch.

"I have spent so many days sleep dreaming about this, about you." He finally spoke, his voice sounding like the William she remembered, cultured and soft not like the hard cold one he used as Spike. "And before reality hits again I want this dream to last as long as possible. To forget the last hundred some years even happened and pretend that it's the night you first awakened. I want to show you what it would have been like."

His voice was nothing more than a husky whisper, causing Zeldie to shiver in anticipation her eyes taking on an excited happy glow.

Spike sat up and captured her lips in a fierce kiss, and within a blink he had their positions reversed with him straddling her waist. Ever so gently but never breaking the kiss he unbuttoned her shirt . . .

Spike stared down at the love of his live, er, un-life rather, and he knew that there was so much that had changed for him. He needed to figure things out before he committed himself to another relationship. He was far to confused. But one thing was for sure he had to help Xander, he was trapped and Spike knew how to free him.

Giles sighed as he tiredly rubbed his eyes, it had been almost a full night of research with Willow, Meg and Angel helping as well but none of them could find anything that may resemble what spell Xander was now suffering under.

The sound of a book being thrown against the wall and a chair hitting the floor drew his attention to Angel, the source. He was standing leaning heavily on his hands on the table anger radiating off of him in waves.

"That is not helping." Giles sighed for what felt like the millionth time. Angel growled at him and slowly advanced.

"Neither is sitting here going through your damned books Watcher! Now I know that you have other resources, contacts both demon and mortal alike, so why don't you make a few calls," he was now only a few inches from Giles face, "or do I have to show you firsthand how I earned my reputation?" he threatened lowly his eyes flashing gold.

"So the soul truly hasn't changed ya?" Spike smooth drawl drew everyone's attention to him and Zeldie who now stood in the doorway of the library.

Angel's eyes softened instantly as he took in the sight of his favorite childe. The cocky attitude was back in place, a smirk firmly fixed on his face, and a n un-light cigarette held in his hand. Angel sighed as he took in the healthy glow that now surrounded his childe, no longer was his skin that pasty paper white, nor were his eyes tainted by the gold of his other face but a pure piercing blue, and his movements, Angel watched as Spike swaggered towards him, were more fluent and graceful like limbs were released from confining shackles.

Leaning in close to him, as Spike stood in front of him, Angel took in a deep breath of his scent, it was there buried under the smells of leather and smoke the pure scent of William, the lightest sent of ink and aged paper. "My Childe," Angel whispered before he drew him into a tight hug nuzzling the turning mark on his neck trying to take as much of that scent in as possible.

For just a moment Spike lost himself in his Sire's embrace, remembering when he had looked up to this man as a friend, a teacher, a father, and taking in this sense of safety and love that he hadn't felt since that day a century ago. But all to soon he pulled back and took a few steps away from Angel trying like hell not to let the hurt look that entered his sire's eyes affect him.

"William?" Angel asked confusion and hurt evident in his voice.

"Spike, its Spike now." He said in a hard voice, wondering if he was the only one who heard the nervous tremor threatening to break through.

Angel nodded his understanding trying to hide the pain that shot through him.

"I can't go back, not sure I really want to. I have spent so many years hating you, drifting away from what I once was because it was what you loved, what you taught me to be. That I don't know if there's anything left that was once your William."

Again Angel nodded his understanding, feeling his un-beating heart throb in pain he had done nothing to deserve his childe's hatred yet it appeared that no matter how he proved it, it wouldn't matter he had lost him.

"You're leaving aren't you?" Zeldie's tear chocked voice brought Angel out of his own self pity; he had to remember that he wasn't the only one suffering. He wasn't alone anymore, even if he did lose William . . . er . . . Spike, he had people to care for now.

Spike nodded, "I have to, I need to think, I need to figure all this out in my head. I need to do this myself with no one trying to persuade one way or the other. I need time to figure out who I am, the William you knew or the Spike I've forced myself to become."

"Then if that is your decision," Angel said, an arm around Zeldie's waist offering what comfort he could. "No one here will stop you, but remember you are always welcome and if you ever need anything . . ." he trailed off knowing that the younger vampire understood.

Spike nodded grateful that his decision hadn't driven a bigger wedge between himself and his sire.

"No matter what answers I find I will come back even if it is only to tell you goodbye forever." Spike turned away from the pain filled eyes of his sire and his love, who was crying into Angel's chest, and made his way to stand beside the unconscious Xander.

"I only have one question before I leave," he said not turning around, "If you cared for the boy so much, why did you leave him like you did two years ago?"

Angel stared at him in shock, "How did you know?"

Spike smirked that cocky 'I-know-everything' smirk, "I held him prisoner remember."

"And he just opened up to you?" Giles interrupted looking shocked, "I've know the boy for over a year and he never one confided in me."

Spike smirked again, although there was no humor what so ever in it. "Yeah well some find it easier to talk to another person with a similar past. And to all known knowledge we shared not only a similar past of being betrayed by someone we loved, but that same betrayer. Not sure what's true anymore."

He ignored the faces of Angel and Zeldie as he turned back to Xander, "Do know that the boy didn't deserve what you did to him nor what you're doing now, dating that blond bitch."

Angel sighed and shock his head, "I did what I had to."

Spike turned to face him in shock then settled into anger, "What you had to!? What kind of bullshit is that?"

Angel snarled at him, he didn't like his childe questioning him nor talking back and he didn't want to discuss this in front of all these people who weren't family. If he discussed it, it would be just him and Xander.

"It means what I said, I did what I had to do!"

"For him or for you?" Spike pushed forward surprised to realize that he wasn't afraid of his sire's anger as he should have been.

"Drop it Spike," Angel growled menacingly something that had once sent even the Master running. But Spike ignored it and snarled right back.

"I want an answer! The boy deserves one too! Do you know what his life has been like since you left him? Do you know what he's lived through with that thing that calls himself a father. Do you know how many times he nearly didn't?"

"Do you have any idea what would have happened to him if I had stayed!?" Angel was beyond angry now, beyond caring who heard him now, just wanting, needing someone to understand how he felt. Spike stopped snarling and stared in surprise at Angel.

"Those damned gypsies had found me, here with Xander, and found me happy again. They didn't like that so they planned to capture not just me but Xander as well. They planned to make him suffer because the more he suffers the more I do! They were going to torture him and nameless other things to him while all I could do was watch. They were going to destroy him and not even have the mercy to kill him after!"

Angel was now advancing on Spike who had yet to move away from Xander.

"Do you really believe that I left him willingly?" Angel demanded, voice bordering on hysteria. "The one person who I could care for, love, and protect since I lost my family, the one person who knew and accepted me for who and what I am!? I would have willingly and without regret walked into the sun if Xander had just asked! The only thing I couldn't and still can't stand is . . ."

His voice dropped as he lost his anger and sadness radiated off him in waves. Spike moved away from them as Angel gently took one of Xander's limp hands. He turned to motion everyone out when he noticed that they had already gone.

"Tell him" Spike's voice brought Angel's head up, eyes sad. "Tell him everything that's left, he's earned it. And hey you may be surprised at the end result."

Angel looked at him curiously, "When did you become all heart?"

Spike smirked as he leaned against the doorway, lighting up a cigarette taking a long drag before turning away, "I'm not, I'm the Big Bad."

And then he was gone.

Angel laughed softly turning back to Xander his eyes filling with tears.

"The only thing I can't stand is causing you pain, seeing you suffer. But it was the only way; I hope you will one day forgive me. Not that I deserve it, but that won't stop me from trying. You always said I was slightly selfish, truth is I'm completely selfish. That's why I came back here to Sunnyhell, I had to see you again make sure you were still alive. Buffy gave me the perfect cover, let everyone think I was dating her while every second I was taking in every aspect of you that I could get, even if it was only your hate.

"I need you like a drug Xander, and I have no intention of giving you up again. If you ever give me a second chance, Xander I love you." He whispered the last part as he leaned down and gently kissed him, so softly, all his feelings trapped within that kiss.

Angel pulled back as a single tear escaped his closed eyes. Shock went through him as a hand gently wiped it away. His eyes shot open to see Xander looking at him in shock.

"You love me?" Xander asked in a horse voice.

"With every fiber of my being." Angel whispered back.

Xander smiled his blinding smile as he sat up tears flowing freely. "You won't leave again?"

"I'll be dust before that happens," Angel vowed.

Xander shook his head, "No, I don't want you dead, er well completely dead. I wish you hadn't left like you did but I understand now. I may have been pissed off about you leaving but I don't think I could handle you dying it would have killed me too."

"May have been?" Angel asked hope filling his voice. Xander nodded smiling at him.

"How can I hate you for doing something because you love me?"

"Because I came back, because I was well basically dating Buffy, because I continued to stay even though I knew how much I was hurting you." Angel said even as he wondered why he was trying to make Xander angry at him.

Xander pulled back to study Angel silently for a moment. "Why did you come back? I mean now of all times? I never expected to see you again let alone get you back."

Angel smiled sadly at him, "Xander when I left I thought it would be forever too. But I always kept tabs on you, knowing who you were friends with, who you were seeing; although that hurt the most thinking you had forgotten me, what your grades were, your trouble subjects in school, everything except where you were living. I never thought that you would move back those things; they don't even deserve the term monsters, its an insult to creatures like me everywhere, so I never asked about that. I now see what a grievous mistake that was.

"But suddenly my informants stopped reporting, I panicked and thought it was perhaps you were killed and that they ran from my anger, so I came to figure out the truth. Found my informants dead or on the run from the Slayer and you were making friends with her. But once I saw you I just couldn't leave again, like I said you're like a drug to me. I began to watch your every moment I could, and when I found out that the Master and Darla were in town I came up with this plan to protect you.

"I knew Darla would figure out that it was you I cared for, so I started to help the slayer, always staying to the shadow's hoping to keep her focus on Buffy. But she wasn't convinced and I knew I had to up the stakes when I discovered her plan to capture you and Buffy to torture the truth out of you both. So I came out of the shadows, and started to openly date her. I have suffered your hate because as long as you hated me you were safe, safe from the Rom, from Darla and the Master, and from Buffy herself."

Angel sighed as he looked away from Xander taking a deep unneeded breath before finishing what he had to say.

"But when William, Spike, took you . . . Xander I nearly lost it. After everything I did to protect you, to keep you from death here it was knocking again. I decided at that moment that if giving you up and making you hate me wasn't enough to keep you safe, I would just have to win you back and make sure stick to your side like glue and never give anything the opportunity to get near you like that again!" Angel vowed venomously.

Xander smiled at him and Angel felt like he was touched by the sun.

"I forgive you Angel! I know I never said this before you left but . . . I love you. Let's just forget these last two years ever happened and move on with our lives."

Angel stared at Xander in stunned surprise, before pulling him in to a deep passion filled kiss. Never in all his existence had he ever felt such relief, such blind pure happiness. Suddenly Angel felt his body fill with bruning pain and his happiness slipping away changing to blind rage . . .


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter Nine

Angle tore himself away from Xander stumbling back several steps, confusion written on both their faces.

"Angel?" Xander's voice sounded like it was a million miles away, he couldn't focus on it he felt like he was being forced under water unable to surface.

Xander watched in horror as Angel grabbed at his chest just above his un-beating heart screaming in pain. He had no idea what was wrong, what he could do. Suddenly he was flanked by Zeldie and Meg.

"What's wrong with him?" Xander's voice was worried and filled with fear. He fought against Zelide's hold as Angel gave the most agonizing scream yet, collapsing to the floor.

"The curse is broken" Meg's amazed voice drew Xander's attention from the withering Angel.

"What do you mean?"

"Now is not the time" Zeldie's voice was heard, "Meg, take Xander and get out of here, I will deal with Angelus!"

"What? NO!" Xander yelled renewing his efforts to get to his hurt lover.

"I'm sorry Xander," Meg said before she stepped up behind him mumbling something under her breath before gently touching his head. Slowly Xander started to lose his energy, his head began to feel heavy, but he continued to struggle giving one more heart filled call of "ANGEL!" before his eyes shut and his body dropped.

Meg wasted no time quickly wrapping arms around Xander's waist quietly chanting as her fearful eyes fell upon the now silent and still form in front of them. Disappearing in a blinding light with her heavy burden just as golden hate filled eyes fluttered open

*************************************************************

Angelus growled as he slowly stood his golden eyes taking in his surroundings. He didn't know where he was or how he got there. A familiar scent brought his eyes to Zeldie, the young Rom girl that William had fallen for, but she smelled different then the last time that he had seen her. Slowly, cautiously he moved toward her, his eyes calculating and his heightened sense of smell working over time trying to place the new smell that was dripping off of her.

Zeldie held completely still as her newly freed sire slowly stocked her, fear was threatening to overrun her entire beign but she fought it down. Succumbing to that would only make him attack or worse, and for Angelus the worse could be some many different and horribly painful things. Also with the curse gone she truly had no idea what would happen, this curse had never been broken before, not by anyone let alone a vampire.

Now standing a hair's breath away from her, Angelus took a deep breath eyes sliding closed as he moved that last inch closer to her neck until his nose rested just above her turning mark. Ever so slowly Zeldie tilted her neck submissively to the side. Angelus smiled as he saw the gesturer before he quickly yet gently slid his fangs in to the mark. He only took a few swallows before he pulled back licking the bite closed. He stared at her in wonder.

Then suspicion.

"I donea remember making ye." The rich Irish accent think in his voice and his eyes flashing. "But blood can nay lie. Where is William, Darla and Drusilla?" he demanded.

"William left town a few days ago, Dru disappeared, and you staked Darla." She spoke not trying to hide her fear now, Angelus was the meanest, scariest master vapire ever made and if he thought that she was hiding something she didn't stand a chance.

"I staked Darla?" he sounded confused as he studied her through narrowed eyes, "why would I stake her, leave her, aye, but stake her I donea think so she was my Sire, and demanded at least that small amount of respect."

Angelus took a deep breath and growled, "why are ye afraid? I never hurt my own blood without good reason."

"I am afraid of your reaction when you remember the last some hundred years Sire." Zeldie's voice was more than a whisper and she shook with fear.

"Hundred years? What are ye talking about?" he demanded as he took a step back, before shaking his head apparently she was slightly addled this Drusilla. "There was someone here with you, I saw them disappear who was it?" he growled choosing to ignore her memory lapse comment, not believing her.

"My sister Meg . . ." she paused debating whether or not to mention Xander, but was saved from answering as Angelus growled louder at her.

"How could a hundred years pass if your sister is still alive, I wouldnea have turned her!"

"You didn't, she was punished by our clan for caring for me, both mortals and vampire weaknesses and a vampires life span."

Suddenly Angelus snarled eyes flashing, face shifting "The curse! Your clan cursed me!" he yelled at her Zeldie cringed in shock and fear but said nothing, expecting to be hit, thrown, or even drained.

Angelus noticed this and forcibly calmed himself a little, gently cupping her cheek drawing her eyes to his, "I dona blame ye, my childe." He spoke softly and saw the fear drain out of her eyes.

"You are not mad at me?" she whispered in shock.

"Nay, ye are family, I made you." He hardened his voice and eyes, "But your "clan" is now at my mercy," his smile was pure evil. "They forfeited their lives to me the moment they tried to place a curse on me!"

Zeldie's eyes widened as she stared at Angels, never had he ever been this blood thirsty, "Sire?" she whispered as he turned from her and began pacing.

"We will need to find Drusilla, and wait for William to return and thee we can begin . . ."

"Sire, I don't think either . . ." Zeldie stopped as a hand closed around her throat lifting her off of the floor, a game faced Angelus snarling at her.

"Ye donea question me, ye donea think, and ye donea interrupt me!" he yelled the last as he tossed her across the room, she slammed into the wall.

***************

Drusilla giggled as she watched that little bitch that had taken her Spike from her, and turned her Daddy from her hit the wall with a thud loud enough to be heard outside the library.

Looking back to the small fire that she had started beside here, she continued to sprinkle the strange green and blue herb into and began to chant once again in a language long dead to this world. A language that she a ripped from the head of some monk so many years ago, long before her Spike was even turned or in fact born.

The fire flashed white before turning from orange to red to green to blue and settled on black. "Now your mine, Daddy, all mine once again!" Drusilla laughed darkly as she bottled some of the black flame in a vial. As she placed the stopper into the vial the rest of the black flame went out instantly, all it's magic being transferred into the small flame inside the vial.

"As long as this flame exists it will fill your mind and heart, it will rule your decisions and actions, and it will make you as black as it is itself. You will rejoice in the slaughter of innocence and dance in the rivers of blood that we shall make. Pain will be your pleasure, anger your joy, and violence your first action!" Drusilla was laughing, although it could be described as a witch's evil cackle.

***************

Zeldie flinched as she stood rubbing her neck, her eyes fearful. How could this have happened, Angelus had changed so completely, he didn't resemble the former master vampire at all.

Angelus took a deep breath trying to calm the burning rage that ran through his veins. He truly had no idea why he had reacted in this way. Never had he treated one of his Childer like that, not even Drusilla.

"Now, what were you saying?" he asked almost kindly.

"You warned Drusilla to stay out of your sight because you would stake her the next time she crossed your path. And William," she shook her head sadly, "I don't think William will be returning any time soon, you let him leave town to think."

Angelus stocked toward her anger radiation off of him in waves now, and the feeling to strike his childe trying to take complete control of him. "What do ye mean? I would never allow my family to leave me unless they were as ash!" He towered over her, his low cold voice sending shivers down her back.

"Your right Daddy," a familiar voice called from within the stacks.

Drusilla danced forward a crazy smile danced in her eyes. Zeldie's eyes narrowed this was not good, nor did it make sense why she would risk their sire's wrath after what happened earily.

"Dru?" Angelus questioned, she may be crazy but insightful most times.

"The stars sing to me Daddy," she said in a sing song voice. "They speak of betrayal and control. They whisper a name." she came within a foot of Angelus and Zeldie, before she cried out in pain grabing her head and dropped to the ground. Angelus was at her side in a second, worry clear in his eyes. Dru looked up at Angelus with sad eyes, "Esmeralda, Esmeralda, Esmeralda," she continued to whisper as a chant.

Angelus's eyes snapped up and locked on shocked/frightened blue ones.

"Magic, magic everywhere and not a drop to spare." Drusilla sang softly. Angelus stood slowly never taking his eyes from Zeldie's.

"Sire please, she's lying!" Zeldie pleaded as he stocked closer to her.

"She doesnea know how to lie, she's bloody crazy! Plus you are the only one here that can do magic!"

Zeldie know that the battle was lost, she had to find a way of escape and warn everybody about what happened, but she also knew that she had to try and reach her Sire, make him see sense.

"That's not true, Drusilla also . . ." Zeldie never finished as Angelus backhanded her sending her flying into the wall near the library doors.

"I willnea listen to your lies!"

Suddenly the library doors opened and Willow bounced in.

"Hey I was wondering if . . ." she stopped dead as she took in the scene; Drusilla smiling evilly as she rocked on the floor singing to herself, Angelus in game face snarling and standing protectively over her, and Zeldie leaning on the wall her face showing her pain and grief and fear.

"What . . .?" Willow tried to talk, but only succeeded in drawing Angelus's attention to her.

Angelus turned to face the new comer and smiled at the smell that hit him, blood and fear. The distinct smell of prey.

Willow watched the eyes flashing between brown and gold, took in the evil smile coming from her friend. Something was terribly wrong.

Zeldie was suddenly standing in front of her protectively.

"Ye protect a human?" Angelus asked surprised.

"I do it for you, for when you remember, for when you are yourself again." Zeldie spoke sadly.

"I will destroy you." Angelus spoke calmly the promise full of pain.

"You will try Sire." Zeldie said just as calmly with a new air of confidence to her, her fear firmly pushed back and under control now.

"Is there anyone left Willow?" she asked softly.

"No, I was the last." Her voice fearful and curious.

"Good" Zeldie suddenly spun and grabbed Willow around the waist and began chanting. Willow watched as Angelus approached them growling in game face over Zeldie's shoulder before she engulfed in a bright white light.

*************************************************************

Willow stared wide-eyed as they appeared inside the mansion. She hastily stepped away from Zeldie.

"That . . . who . . . what . . ." she gasped out before she fainted, Zeldie caught her before she hit the ground.

Meg entered the front room just in time to see her sister catch the unconscious red head. She rushed over as her sister laid the girl on the couch.

"What happened?" she questioned as he gently brushed the young witches hair back.

"It was Angelus that awoke but yet not Angelus. He lost his memory of everything that has happened over the last hundred years. But it's not the same master vampire that he was, this one is well . . . more easily angered, more prone to violence without any real reason. Almost as if his humanity is gone."

Meg looked up in fear, "Did he attack her?"

Zeldie smiled at her little sisters concern for the red head, she knew that Meg cared deeply for Willow.

"No sister, I brought her here before he could."

"Did he attack you sister?" Meg asked blushing as she realized that she inquired about an almost stranger before her dear sister and protector.

"No, not really, just tossed me around a bit." She smiled at Meg gently brushing her fingers through Meg's hair.

"Don't worry sister you did not offend me, you have been alone for too long. I do not begrudge you what happiness you find, my lovely."

Meg smiled and hugged her sister around the waist not bothering to stand from her kneeling position, burying her face in Zeldie's stomach. She sighed slightly drawing Zeldie's questioning eyes.

"She reminds me of Gabrielle, in small ways."

"Gabrielle?" Zeldie asked confused, "That blond warrior girl that stayed in our camp for a while?"

"Yes, she had the same ideals of right and wrong, the same hidden innocence and the same smile. Although that is not the reason I like her, just the reason's that I first noticed her." Meg said dreamily.

"Where you and her . . .?" Zeldie wasn't sure how to finish that question.

"Yes," Meg smiled in fond memory, "I loved her with all of my heart, like you love William." Meg's voice dropped into whisper as she continued, "But sadly our father discovered that she was actually the slayer, he blamed her for drawing the vampire's to our camp and for your death. He . . . he had her killed. I watched helpless as they tied her up and left her in known vampire territory. She didn't fight them, she stared into my eyes the entire time, her green eyes held so many emotions; sadness, love, curiosity of the next world, only a little bit of anger and resentment at our people, and acceptance. It was like that she know that she was going to die years before and did nothing to fight that destiny. She accepted it, but she was happy, those last few days she lived a life time, a life time of happiness and battle free days. In her eyes she told me good-bye."

Zeldie stared at her in surprise, gently brushing her fingers through Meg's hair.

"Why didn't I know?" How could she have missed her sister falling in love? And the woman's death?

"You were falling in love with William at the time you didn't have moment for your little sister's conversations." Although it was said without any anger, malice or past hurt, it still cut Esmeralda deeply.

"The night you left the mortal reality so did my Gabrielle. I lost you both you both in one night." She finally looked up to meet her sisters eyes, the shame that filled her eyes shocked Zeldie.

"I blamed you, you know. That's why I was at your grave that night, I hated you. I hated you so much that you first crawled out of your grave I tried to kill you." Meg dropped her eyes unable to hold her sisters shocked ones, not wanting to watch it turn to anger or worse hate.

"Why didn't you?" Zeldie whispered her question.

"I had you pinned, you were weak with blood lust and confused, it was easy. I even had Gabrielle's stake poised over your heart, but as I looked in to your eyes the gold slowly disappeared leaving stunning blue. Blue eye's filled with confusion, fear, hunger, pain, and love. The last confused me because father told me all vampire's were evil killing machines. But you looked at me with love and you didn't fight me. I remember being so angry that I grabbed you by the top of our dress pulling you up and screaming in your face, 'I won't you fight me?' your answer was simple and what changed my mind about the truth of father's words."

"What did I say?" barely a whisper fighting the tears that filled her eyes.

"You said 'you're my sister'." Meg didn't even try to fight her tears, she had been holding these feeling inside far too long. These were things that she never talked about, things that she tried very hard to forget. Zeldie knelt down in front of Meg gently wiping away her tears and pulled her close.

"That's as true now as it was then, my little Meg. You're my sister and I will love you forever no matter what may happen. I don't blame you for what you almost did, I don't blame you for hating me. We've both made mistakes Megs, but they are in the past now and the future is what matters."

Zeldie and Meg didn't know how long they knelt there holding each other and crying for the past hurts and present problems.

"Please tell me you're not like that because Willow's hurt or dead?" Xander's fearful voice brought them back to reality.

Zeldie stood wiping the last of her tears away, "No Xander, Willow's just fine only fainted."

"Why what happened?" Xander asked again leaning heavily on the door frame, while holding his head, he had such a bad headach it wasn't funny.

"Oh so very much but first, how are you feeling Xander?" Zeldie asked.

"I feel like I was hit by a mack truck followed by a jet plane crash ended by an atom bomb." Xander moaned as he stumbled further into the living room, nearly falling flat on his face only to be caught by Zeldie's lightning fast reflexes.

"What do you remember?" she asked as she helped him to the chair, a large plush black chair that one would just sink into. Xander smiled remembering when he told Angel that he wanted one of these chairs because they were the perfect reading chair.

"I remember . . . I remember . . . Angel . . . he . . . he told me why he left , why he came back. I remember forgiving him and then the best kiss ever. Then, pain . . . he was in pain." Xander said the last wild eyed worried. Then turned accusing eyes to Meg.

"You knocked me out!" Xander stood up eyes searching the room.

"Angel!?" he called waiting for his newly reclaimed hero to come running in at any moment.

"Angel's not here Xander" Zeldie spoke calmly.

"Then where is he?" Xander turned angry eyes on her.

"At the moment, I really don't know." Zeldie shock her head sadly.

"I left him at the library."

"Why? What was wrong with him?" he shook his head "Never mind I'll find him myself."

Zeldie stepped in his way, "You can't Xander."

"Why the hell not?" Xander demanded trying to push past her.

"Because it's not Angel anymore." Meg said joining her sister's side.

"You mean Angelus?" he asked then brushed it off, "Doesn't matter it's still the man I love."

"No it's not," Zeldie began.

"Look" Xander interrupted her patience completely gone, "I know all about Angelus, what he's done, who he's killed, it doesn't matter I didn't fall for him because of his soul!"

"That's not what I meant," Zeldie sighed softly; frustration starting to take over.

"Then what?" Xander nearly screamed.

"It wasn't Angel but it wasn't Angelus either." She looked at him sadly, "He also has no memory of the last hundred some years."

"What?" he croaked, "Then that means . . ."

"That he doesn't remember you." Zeldie confirmed.

Xander backed away shaking his head in denial.

"No that can't be true! He promised, he. . . he . . ."

"Xander please calm down" Meg said softly.

"No!" Xander screamed, before he tripped over the low coffee table. Gentle but strong arms wrapped around him from behind.

"Shhh . . . Xan, it will be okay." Willow's voice whispered soothingly in his ear.

"We will fix this, we will find a way."

Zeldie let them have a few moments before she interrupted them.

"I hate to mention this but we need to warn the watcher and the slayer. This Angelus has teamed up with Drusilla."

"How?" Willow asked.

"She tricked him, he has no memory of her betrayal, she used that to her advantage."

"Xander and Willow stood with a new determination.

"Alright let's go!"

*************************************************************

Giles and Buffy were making their way through their third grave yard that night.

"Buffy I don't understand what's happened to you?" Giles finally got the courage to ask.

Buffy sighed and looked at him with a sneer.

"Does it look like I care Giles?"

"But that's just it Buffy you used to care!" Giles said frustrated.

"Yeah and where did that get me, I ask you?" she snapped back.

"How about a clear conscious, friends that care, a good life?" Xander's voice came from behind them, Giles and Buffy watched as the group of four advanced on them.

"Oh good," Buffy huffed not even pretending to be happy to see them, "Your awake."

"That I am." Xander smiled at her it was full of smug vindictiveness, "I got the kiss of a prince charming just like in the fairy tales."

Anger burned in Buffy's eyes as she crouched low to attack.

"Is this a private party or can anyone join?" A deep male voice called everyone's attention to the shadow's of the tree line not far from them.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

Everyone turned to take in the new comer, he was Xander's height, dark brownish black hair, soft brown eyes. He wore black jeans a white wife beater shirt with a black leather jacket. The biker look was finished by a neatly trimmed goatee.

"Who the hell are you?" Buffy demanded. The man just chuckled , as he approached them, well more like swaggered towards them.

"You see that would normally wound my already small sense of self-worth and self-esteem if I didn't already know the truth about you "Buffy"." He said putting her name in hand quotes.

"What do you mean by that?" Buffy snarled this man was getting on her last nerve and the others were getting far too curious.

"Wait a second," Willow said in fascination, "I know you!" the man gave her a curious look.

"Oh? You do?" his voice seemed awed.

"Yeah! Your Pike!" Willow said smiling.

Pike just stared at her in surprise, "How?"

"Buffy showed me some pictures from her life in L.A., you occupied a lot of them from her last year there."

Pike actually seemed to blush with a shy smile. "I'm glad that she didn't leave me behind as some dark secret."

"Wait a second! Rewind and slow down." Xander said confused. "If Buffy told you about him,"

"He was her boyfriend before she moved, they never actually broke up." Willow supplied to Pike's blushing embarrassment.

"And the were really, really close right?" he turned hard eyes to Buffy.

"Then why doesn't she seem to recognize him?"

"Four sets of eyes widened with shock before narrowing in anger and suspicion. Pike remained unaffected, while Buffy seemed to actually be afraid.

"You see," Pike said drawing everyone's attention, "I arrived here about four months ago, to this "Buffy" drooling over some vampire and being some spoiled psycho chick, when the night before she was normal and herself, even made plans to get together. That's when I figured out she wasn't Buffy the Vampire Slayer."

"Yes I am, who else could I be?" she demanded while trying to sneak away.

"If you're really Buffy tell me, where did you go to school?" Pike asked with a smirk.

"Duh, in L.A. of course." Buffy sneered.

"Good general answer." Pike laughed, "On what event did we burn down the gym?"

"a school one," Buffy said with no confidence.

"Wow, vague much?" he continued to laugh, "Ok here's an easy one where did we meet?"

Buffy said nothing, her eye frantic to find an escape.

"No answer, well I know someone who can answer." Pike smirked as he turned to look into the shadows. Willow, Xander, and Giles stared in surprise and horror as Cordilla stepped out into the moon light.

"Where did you go to school?" Pike asked her.

". . ." "Cordy" answered.

"On what event did we burn down the gym?"

"The Senior Dance, our first official date." Cordy smiled sweetly at Pike.

"Where did we meet?" Pike returned the smile.

"The movies before I was the slayer, I was there with m spoiled rich friends and you snuck in."

Pike turned back to 'Buffy', "What was the name of my friend who became a vampire?" she just gave him a blank stare.

"Benny," 'Cordy' answered.

"What was the name of the Master Vampire you took out?" again nothing but silence from the blond.

"Lothus."

"What was the name of your Watcher?"

"Giles?" it was a panic filled question.

"Nope," Cordy said sadly, "Malick"

"No one knew me before I moved here how could they possibly buy this act!" Buffy demanded fear and panic lacing her voice.

"What did I give you for good luck at the cheerleading tryouts?" Xander asked in suspicion.

"Ummm . . . a ummm . . ." she tried to think of something, anything to answer.

"A bracelet, I keep it in my jewelry box when I'm not wearing it." Cordy smiled at him.

"What did you tell me your motto was, that first night at the Bronze?" Willow asked her 'resolve face' firmly in place.

"Get a makeover to get a guy?" 'Buffy' asked not even trying to hide her sneer now, she know that she was caught.

"Live every moment, cause tomorrow you might be dead." 'Cordy' smirked now.

"Who saved your life during the fight with the Master?" Giles asked Cordilla as he cleaned his glasses.

"It was Xander," she smiled at them, "He forced Angel to take him to the Master's lair and then gave me CPR after I drowned."

"Xander and Willow pounced hugging Cordilla in death grips, while Pike watched with a smile, and Giles muttered to himself as he continued to clean his glasses.

Only Meg and Zeldie noticed fake Slayer trying to make a break for it. A few mumbled words from them and she stopped mid-step.

"How could this possibly be?" Willow asked tears leaking from her eyes.

"How could we not have known?"

"Where have you been?" Xander asked more angry in his voice then tears.

"How do we fix this?"

"Slow down guys, please" the Cordy shaped Buffy laughed, "one question at a time! Cordilla, after Angel by passed her in the Bronze to get to me, became even more jealous of me. So she paid some gypsy lady to perform a body swap spell thingy and then kept me in my locked in my own freaking attic. She kept me alive because if she didn't we would both die. Her body is still connected to her soul even though it was in my body, and well you all have been a little pre-occupied with either boys/vamps" she winked at Xander.

"Or pretty girls" she looked between Giles and Willow, causing them all to blush.

"Cordilla thought it was funny to keep updated on what was going on in my life and how she planned to ruin all your lives." She offered in way of explanation of her up-to-datedness.

"And how to fix this I have no idea." She shrugged in defeat.

"I think we may be able to help," Meg said sweetly.

"Really?" Cordy/Buffy asked happily.

"Meg right?" she asked offering her hand. Meg smiled and nodded.

"And Zeldie?" she asked receiving only a nodded of acknowledgement.

"I'm surprised neither of us sensed it earlier," Meg said staring at Buffy/Cordilla. "It's heavy magic."

"But Rom magic," Zeldie stated smugly, "means we can break it. But we need a few things."

"I'll go get them," Meg volunteered, "Sister why don't you take them to the house, explain what we came here too."

"Wait," Zeldie grabbed her arm, "It will be daylight soon."

"I will be careful, I will take the underground." Meg reassured her sister with a smile.

"Alright," Zeldie said with a sigh and an apologetic smile, it was severely hard to stop being an older sister even after all these years.

"Hey Wills why don't you go with Meg?" Cordy/Buffy suggested with a wink that caused Willow to blush beat red.

"S . . .sure, I'd love to." Meg smiled shyly in return to the blushing red-head and nodded her acceptance.

The group watched the two girls walk away, Xander smiled, Giles cleaned his glasses (again!), Buffy/Crodilla looked grossed out, while Cordy/Buffy giggled while leaning into a smirking Pike, Zeldie smiled softly after them before turning a sly smile on the dark haired girl.

"Not very subtle."

"You complaining?"

"Nope," she laughed, "couldn't be happier for her, Meg gave up quite a bit for me over the years I'll do anything to see that she gets who or what she wants, even if that means having to lock them in a closet to do it."

Cordy/Buffy laughed along with Pike, but sobered quickly seeing the pain filled eyes of Xander. Moving slowly she gently put her hand on his shoulder waiting for his eyes to meet hers.

"Xander, I know about how you feel for Angel, I just want you to know that I have no intention of perusing him when I'm me again, and if you still hate him after I'll stake him for you." She said with complete seriousness.

Xander couldn't help but smile at his friend before his eyes fell and filled with tears. "Thanks Buffy but you don't know the whole story, the back story or the new developments."

She gave him curious eyes, "Want to tell me?"

"Not here," Zeldie said sniffing the air, "We have to hurry, some of us don't fare so well in this Sunny state."

"Of course," Cordy/Buffy said suddenly all business, "let us head back to the . . ."

"Our place," Xander interrupted her then blushed shyly at the surprised looks everyone, except Zeldie, throw at him, "It's the safest place right now, I promise you." He explained.

"Alright Xan," She said leaning up to kiss Pike, "will you come or are you going to get your bike?"

"I'll grab my bike tomorrow, I'd rather like to figure out what the hell is going on in this town." Pike said with a smile to everyone.

"I'll take care of the bitch." Zeldie said following Xander letting him lead the way, as she dragged the fake slayer by the neck.

Zeldie tossed the blonde through the door before jumping through herself slightly smoking. "Damn I hate when that happens!" she complained as she patted the smoke from her hair.

Pulling the fake blond up she grumbled all the way to the sitting room, smiling when she saw that Xander had gotten a hard backed chair and rough rope to contain their 'guest' for awhile.

"Thank you Xander," she smiled, "I'll go make some tea for everyone, why don't you begin the tale."

Xander nodded and motioned the three remaining companions to sit.

"Xander, since when do you live in a mansion?" Buffy asked in awe.

"That's the end of the story Buffy, I need to start that the beginning. Two years before you arrived here, in my tenth grade year. . ."

* * *

Xander sat looking into space as Meg and Willow entered the sitting room from the kitchen, having come in through the underground tunnels. They giggled softly to each other, drawing Xander's attention, he smiled at the girls they hadn't even noticed is presence yet they were so wrapped up in each other.

"Oh, hey Xand," Willow blushed.

"Get everything alright?" he asked

"Oh yes it's all very common stuff easy to find and cheap to get." Meg answered.

"Where is everyone else?" Willow asked sitting as far away from the gagged and bound blond as possible.

"Zeldie went up to her room only a few moments ago, she was starting to pass out. Giles went to the library to do his research thing, and the Cordilla shaped Buffy and her bad boy Pike headed up to a quest room a few hours ago they got tired of the Buffy shaped Cordilla complaining about seeing her perfect body make out with "the white trash trailer park."

"Well tonight we'll have a Buffy shaped Buffy and a Cordilla shaped cheerleader." Willow smiled, watching as Meg sat further from her then she liked.

Xander watched the silent communication between the two girls, "Don't" he said softly.

"Don't what?" They asked in unison.

"Don't put off or hide your feelings for each other because of my problems. I'm happy for you both I really am. I also know deep down my Angel still exists, just got to wait for him." Xander's voice was light but his smile didn't reach his eyes.

Willow got up and hugged him tightly, "We'll find a way I know it." she promised.

"Yes, well," Xander blinked away his tears, "I'll hold you to it seeing as I'm leaving after the soul swap stuff."

"Leaving?" they both cried in shock.

"It's thought best for two reasons, first we'll need all the help we can get facing Drusilla and this not quite Angelus Angel, so I'm heading out to find Spike."

That's a good idea" Meg agreed, "He'll know all about Drusilla. How she acts, what she likes, where she hunts, what her plans may be."

"Exactly!" Xander said with a wide smile.

"What's the second reason?" Willow whispered afraid of the answer, causing the smile to fall from his face.

"Zeldie feels it would be best if I don't see this side of my Angel. I have to agree with her actually, I just got him back I can't watch him become the monster he never wanted to become." Xander said sadly.

"But wasn't he . . .?" Willow began to question before she looked away blushing at the hard look Xander gave her.

"He was NEVER a monster Willow," Xander growled, "yes he killed, but only in self defense, he never killed who he ate unless they attacked him or his family first. And yes in his yearly years he tortured, killed, and maimed in pleasure but that was Darla's and the Master's influence after he created Drusilla he realized what he was doing and what he needed to do." Xander was breathing harshly by the end his face flushed from his out burst.

"Sorry" she mumbled.

"No, I'm sorry Wills I shouldn't have snapped at you like that." He sighed, smiling apologetically.

Xander sighed as he watched Willow and Meg set up for the spell work for later and before he knew it he had passed out, he was so physically and emotionally exhausted.

Xander sighed as he stretched yawning before his eyes flew open, he fell asleep! How could he, he was on watch duty. Making sure the slayer wannabe didn't escape.

Looking around he realized that the blond was missing, so was the stuff for the ritual, except for a few scattered candles, that gave off a soft glow. Standing he made his way to the hallway that's when he noticed that the candle's formed a path leading down the hallway and up the stairs.

Walking cautiously but letting his curiosity lead him, "Hello?" he called. Maybe Meg was making a move on Willow and he was about to walk in on something that would scar him for life. Or Pike was working his bad boy stuff on Buffy, again scared for life. Or maybe . . . oh God Giles and that Calendar lady, he shivered at the thought, that wouldn't just scar him that you kill him!

"Meg? . . . Willow? . . . Buffy? . . . Pike?" he called out but there was no reply, no sound at all actually. Taking a deep breath he called out the on that made him shiver, "Giles? . . . G-man?" still nothing. He made it to the stairs and frowned they were covered in rose petals, but not just any roses but blood red roses, his favorite. Not fake ones either but the real deal this must have cost a fortune.

Then a thought came to him, maybe Spike came back maybe this was all for Zeldie. That made him smile even if he did admit to another scaring possibility, "Spike? . . . Zeldie?" Xander continued to follow the path of rose petals and candles.

"Anybody here?" still silence, now he was getting nervous the path led straight to the master bed room, Angel's room. If this was a joke it wasn't funny! Opening the door he growled in anger at the room, candle's giving it that soft romantic glow, rose petals scattered across the floor and the bed that was covered in black satin sheets and the red comforter, Angel's favorite. Xander walked into the room angrily.

"Alright that's it, this isn't funny! I swear when I find you heartbeat or not I'm putting a stake through your chest!!!" Xander yelled. But nothing moved there was no laughter, no one jumping out screaming gotcha, just silence. The door clicked shut disturbing the silence, Xander spun around taking up a defensive position to see a dark figure with his back to Xander.

"Who the hell are you, how'd you get in here?" he demanded his heartbeat jumping as he heard the lock slide into place. The figured turned and Xander focused on the small key in the large slightly tanned hand. His mind not wanting to believe what his heart and his eyes were telling him.

"No hello?" the deep voice asked forcing Xander to focus on the man's face.

"Angel?" He barely whispered. The answering smirk was his answer.

"More or less" Angel slowly stocked towards him, forcing Xander to back step. "What's wrong Xand? You've never been afraid to be alone with me before."

"You had a soul before" Xander said with fake confidence feeling the bed hit the back of his knees, but Angelus didn't stop causing Xander to fall backwards. Angelus moved in a blur pinning Xander to the bed, straddling his hips hands above his head. Angelus leaned down taking a deep breath of Xander's sent.

"Just as I remember, maybe just a bit sexier" he murmured.

"Remembered!?" Xander asked in awe, not bothering to fight against the vampires hold.

"Of course I promised didn't I? I'd never leave you again, you're mine and only mine, just as I am yours." Angelus replied placing gentle kisses across Xander's face and neck.

"But Zeldie said that you lost the last hundred years," Xander said breathlessly trying to remember how to breath and think properly.

"She was right and wrong," he murmured paying extra attention to the pulse point where Xander's neck met shoulder. "It just took some time for everything to come back."

"Oh Angel," Xander moaned, arching his hips into the larger body above him.

"Tonight' special Xander" Angel smirked down at him "Do you know why?"

"Because you become truly mine, in every way." Xander gave him a strange look.

"But I thought I already was?"

"No Xander not yet," Suddenly Angel switched to game face swooping down to bite Xander's neck viscously causing him to scream and . . .


End file.
